Wednesday - Some Great Reward

The company has just presented Short Shouty Bloke with a brand new Mercedes as a bonus for bringing in a large and profitable account. This was news was announced glowingly in today's Company Weekly Bulletin causing Dan to seethe with envy and Gareth to start polishing his Magnum .45.

Of course there isn't much profit left once we've paid out for all the extra staff to deal with the generated complaints - the customer base for this account being the over 65's, in particular pensioners that would make Victor Meldew seem like a really happy-go-lucky kind of chap - the complaints ratio is effectively 1 to every policy sold.

That's in addition to the inordinate delays in the business transfer process which isn't even working because this project was all rushed through under the catch-all mantra of 'It's a profitable account' and corners had to be cut and unrealistic deadlines met because 'it was a profitable account.'

Short Shouty Bloke has zoomed into the sunset in his brand new Merc, happy in the knowledge that he brought in the account within deadline and oblivious to the fact that what he brought in doesn't actually work.

But then getting the system to work wouldn't have got him his Merc.

When the board eventually come looking for someone to blame (clue - it won't be SSB) I'll be hiding under a rock somehwere and I won't come out until the last of the corpses have been buried.

Tuesday - The Circle of Strife

Sorry I've not blogged for a while but I hope to rectify that situation over the next few days.

I believe that I've uncovered the reason for my underlying paranoia.

Apparently, I have been held accountable for all of the faults with the feedback logging system even though I had nothing to do with its development or design. This may have been due to Kate's recommendations for improving the platform which I'd helped her to document.

Somehow between the few months that the document detailing improvements got lost in Anne's vacillation and the auditor visit, my name became irrevocably linked to all of the problems associated with the feedback system instead of the solution that I'd helped to create.

This would explain why I'd find myself fending off questions like 'How do you add a second complainent?' as if I was the all-knowing oracle of the application.

As to Kate's original proposal, this re-emerged this week, albeit with a new author on the title page - one of the consultants Diamond Des had brought in to sort out the feedback system problems following the auditor visit.

Both Anne and Des are going to launch a project to implement the consultant's recommendations.

I suppose if you've paid someone £30,000 just to relay staff suggestions, then you have to justify it really, don't you.